In today’s episode we’re talking about transition, and learning to honor the space in between “no longer” and “not yet”. We hope you enjoy it!
Dani : Hi Ladies.
Dani: How are we doing today?
Natalie: I’m doing good.
Candace: I’m doing very well thank you.
Dani: I’m glad. Before we get started. Natalie, do you have a card for us?
Natalie: So today we have “Divine Patience”.
Dani : Oh sure.
Natalie: Okay. So it says, I understand the power of divine patience, knowing that divine patience is intelligent waiting, I wait, for my soul to bring forth the right conditions and opportunities for me. I wait for the right thing, whether that may be a person, a job, an idea, or a solution. Practicing divine patience, I allow time and space to enter the picture. I trust the unfolding of events. I trust that when the frequencies are aligned and the energies have ripened, the right moment will signal its arrival. It will make itself known to me through synchronicity and chance encounters. When I give myself the gift of divine patience, the gifts of time and space, I open myself to the subtleties of manifestation and enjoy the journey of discovery. I marvel at the fascinating twists and turns of creation in action, watching with wonder as things unfold organically in their own way and in their own timing
Dani : And as we always say, that’s so perfect. I can’t believe how perfect that is.
Natalie: I love this deck.
Dani: So if you just look at like part of the part of the skeptic in me is just like, Oh, I’m sure you could make a meaning out of whatever beautiful card you pulled and kind of apply it, but it just nails it so much. I mean you’ll see how patience and really the idea of divine patience, not just patience, but kind of like an informed patience or patience with faith or patience with trust, is kind of how I was feeling from the card and right. It’s not just the way they know.
Dani: It’s yes, intentional waiting. With that connection. It’s so perfect for today of course. And not only that but the deck that you picked with the certain cards within that deck. Right? So there’s layer upon layer of synchronicity, which is again, what the card is saying, that those little synchronicities show us again and again and confirm you’re on the right track. Here you are, you’re being supported by spirit. You’re, you’re in alignment here. Keep going. We can you. It makes me feel so good. I just want to say thank you Natalie. Thank you spirit. Thank you for all the synchronicities. Thank you for our awareness of the synchronicity so that we can just take joy in it and notice it so that, that just gives a little nod to spirit to like, oh, they’re getting it. Our messages are getting through. Let’s keep it up. Even though they always keep it up anyway. It’s just, I think what gets through, that’s at least what I believe. I believe like spirit’s always, like the messages are always coming in and you’re just sending the river and they’re just all around. You are swimming in them. But it’s just a matter of kind of what we’re going to kind of allow in at the moment and what we’re not. And so without further ado, what are we going to be talking about today besides patience, which is a big part of it.
Dani: So what I want to talk about today is honoring the space between no longer and not yet. Okay. So when I started saying this, I must have seen it as kind of a meme or something and I didn’t know that it was an actual quote and it is from Nancy Levin. So I want to give credit to her. Apparently she is an author and she’s written some books and things, but when I heard it, I just identified with it so much and I feel like, you guys know I’m a coach, right, so I just support people through transformation of all kinds. Right? And when you’re supporting someone through transformation, honoring the space between no longer and not yet is literally almost like the name of the game. It really is where you spend so much of this time because we’re at this moment where we have an awareness, we have an epiphany, we have an awareness, we have a, Oh look what I’m doing. They’re kind of moment. We have a realization, we have a new understanding, and then it’s the time between we have that initial and then the time that it takes us to incorporate that knowledge in such a way that our behavior is automatically reflective, that we really embody that knowledge. So it’s a matter of, I think it was Rumi who said, “You can spend your whole lifetime going from the head to the heart”. This is the journey that I’m talking about. This is the journey of I have an awareness and I want it to be my everyday way of being that shows that I have this awareness that shows whatever that awareness is. I have faith that I’m supported by the universe. I’m on the right path, I am whatever that, whatever that is that we’re moving towards, I’m moving toward empowerment and letting go of kind of things that disempower me. I’m letting go of old ways of being and incorporating new ways of being. So this space, like in the middle, is really what I want to talk about today and giving yourself grace during this time, which can be a couple days, a couple of minutes, a couple of weeks, a couple months, a couple of years, couple of decades…., have it, get it on your deathbed. I mean, it really can be
Candace: A couple of lifetimes…
Dani: Yes, a couple of lifetime’s, several lifetimes, you know whatever that is. So I don’t know any kind of initial thoughts along the, along the subject, you guys,
Candace: I would just like to add that sometimes it’s not about spiritual transformation either, you know, like there’s a very physical aspect to it and I know for myself and my own experience, like that’s a big part of where I am in the world right now. So I am living that space. I am breathing that space. And I mean yes, it’s in the spiritual sense and yes, it’s in the personal growth sense, but it’s also like very physical with where I’m living, what I’m doing in my business, redefining my relationships, kind of everything about my life, that’s the space I’m in. And sometimes I’m finding it a little difficult to be okay with being in that space because it’s almost like you don’t have a strong grasp on either side, you know, that’s not who I am anymore, but that’s not who I am yet. And so who am I?
Dani : Yes. Oh my gosh, I love it so much.
Natalie: I was just about to say the same thing. It reminds me of it, of the podcast we talked about with cycles and things and it’s like this limbo and it’s really unsettling when you’re in that space because you don’t know whether to cling onto this thing that you’d no longer want or take these really unsteady steps towards that you like that you can’t see. It’s like you kind of going into this fog and it’s like, do I keep going into this fog or do I cling onto this thing that I know I don’t want like, what’s better? And it’s so. It’s really quite an unnerving, you know, unsettling time.
Dani : Yeah, it is. And like you were saying, Candace, one of the things that came across when you were talking is that a lot of times we will have it in our lives in one area at a time. Like we can have a really solid relationship with a partner or something and then be going through this at work or it can be compartmentalized. Or you can be having it with a relationship with one of your children or with a friend or with your job or like with one compartment at a time. But, but sometimes it is every single thing at once. And I feel like this is for me to Candace so I can identify and it’s not some big spiritual idea. It’s like every morning you wake up in the middle of this and what happens is, yes, you’re not that girl anymore, but you’re also not that woman.
Dani : You’re becoming a woman. You’re not the person you once were, but you’re not quite to the person that you’re becoming either. But it can be so challenging when it’s every aspect. When those transformations are so foundational to who we are as people that it shifts literally everything else, our relationships, our work, our everything, so it’s really hard to do it all at once. It’s not really recommended, but there we are there though, right?
Natalie: We often don’t have a choice though, right? Like people kind of don’t necessarily choose that. Like it’s one of those things. I think when you entered that space is because you realize I have no choice. Like I no longer can do this.
Dani : Yeah. Yeah. That’s, that’s really beautiful. I think that’s definitely the way I think we have a couple of different ways that we, that we decided to really transform and the first one is what you just said. Natalie, the old way is so painful that I can’t do it anymore. I have to find a new way. The other way is that we’re so inspired to something new that we’re willing to let go of what we’ve known before and those are really the two ways I feel like that, that transformation really does come about. And the first way can be, you know, even even tougher because it is so painful that we can’t keep doing it. Just the cost is too great to bear because with everything there’s the risk and the reward, you know, the cost and the, and what we gain. And so when we’re in that space, in between, uh, it can be, it can be debilitating, it can bring us down into really like just low vibe energy. It can make us feel stuck. It can make us feel inadequate. It can, we can feel overwhelmed. We can feel lonely. Like all of these different things can come up, but they’re coming up for a reason. They’re coming up to be healed. Like you guys know, like that’s like my big thing. Like if something is coming up, it’s coming up for a reason and the most powerful thing that we can do is look at that reason. Look at, look at it and be willing to feel it and go through it. So one of the, one of the things that I want to talk about in relation to this time is the role of faith. The role of faith in do we deeply, deeply know that… Do we have a belief that this is all part of a plan? Do we have a belief that I’m supported and there are going to be challenges, but I know it’s all working out in the long run. Do we have faith that well, I’m going to be okay no matter what because like I’ve dealt with everything that’s come at me before and here I am kind of okay. Like what is it really? I think part of it for me is thinking somewhere deep down that there is, we’re talking earlier about all the synchronicity and stuff, that there is some, I don’t want to say like a master plan, but there really is like something bigger at play. I’ll say that I won’t say master plan. I won’t say it’s all determined, but I’m going to say there’s something bigger at work and I am just a piece of it and that me thinking of me kind of playing my part in going along moment to moment helps me a lot in navigating this, but I don’t know. What are you guys’ thoughts on faith as part of the process for this? Or if there’s different parts other than faith that help you kind of move through it?
Candace: For me right now, I mean I haven’t got it mastered. I haven’t got it figured out and I don’t have any answers. For me right now though. What provides comfort is two things. So number one, it is the faith that everything will be okay. No matter what it looks like, I’m still going to be okay and I can look at my past and see some pretty hard experiences and I’m still okay and I’m actually better for it. You know, I’m a better person and I’m, I, I’ve grown because of those experiences. So there’s that piece of it that no matter what it looks like, it’s going to be okay. The other piece. Apparently I can’t remember the second thing. So Natalie do you have anything?
Natalie: The things that came to me when, when you were talking about that was so like I think faith is important in all things at all times. So it was like one of those fundamental things that you kind of don’t take for granted. But like I kind of think that you should just have. Embrace everything with faith, but the other things that came to me, what it’s like, what you need to get through it as sort of like an open mind and an open heart. Because in that space of uncertainty it can be really easy to want to shut yourself off and protect like automatic, just shut down like protection mode. And I think that in that space, the quickest way through it potentially. It’s like an open mind and an open heart so that you can receive anything that can come to you. Because while you shut it down, you’re not going to see it. And it reminds me of that card where it’s like, you know, we’ll show you the signs. You look out for the signs and it’s like. I feel like if you shut yourself off through the fear or instability, then you won’t be able to receive those as easily.
The thing I wrote, I don’t really know where I was going with it, but I’ll say it anyway in case you get something from. It was like no resistance, like you need to embrace it and not have resistance to that process and you need time. So not pushing. So there’s one thing like not resistance to it, but then there’s also like just allowing and not trying to, push out of it and it’s really just allowing it to unfold and with divine patience. Exactly how it should. The other thing that came to me, and I’m just gonna read it because I don’t know, I was called to do it, so when you were talking Dani and you hoo ha’d over whether to say girl, or woman, I was like, oh, that reminds me that Brittany Spears song, I’m not a girl and not a woman. So I was like, oh, I’m just going to look up the lyrics and see what it said. And so a couple of things come up in there, which I think is a little bit interesting so … I didn’t think I’d ever be quoting Britney spears on a podcast but you know… but apparently that’s where we are at.
Dani : Well, you know, we are open minded and open hearted.
Natalie: So here’s some Britney. So it says, I used to think I had the answers to everything, but now I know life doesn’t always go my way. Yeah. Feels like I’m caught in the middle. That’s when I realized I’m I’m not a girl. Not yet a woman. All I need is time. A moment that is mine while I’m in between. Which is like, I love that. So when I read it I was like, oh, well that kind of gives me goosebumps, which I’ve never like… it’s kind of weird. And then it says I’m not a girl, but if you look at me closely you will see it in my eyes. This girl will always find her way. I was like, I know that was kind of off piste, but you know, there we go.
Dani : I love how it’s perfect. And I love how I felt like I misspoke when I said girl and woman, and then felt like I had to go back and correct myself. Spirit was right there saying no, you said it for a reason. This is another one of those little synchronicities and those little things to notice to, to know that you’re on the right path, which is one of the things that helps me through this journey is noticing synchronicity. Noticing when spirit is just dropping that little bread crumb, that little confirmation of yes, you’re on the right path. Here’s the next little step. Not Revealing, here’s your big picture, here’s your next 12 steps and where you’re headed. But just revealing that next little thing, only to get it we have to be in a place of peace and in a place of the present moment. Present moment awareness. Go ahead, Candace.
Candace: I’ve written it down because I finally remembered the second thing was being in the present moment and going through, you know, thinking about those teachings and applying it to the in between space and just realizing that in the present moment I am okay. And this is where I’m supposed to be in this moment, so maybe I haven’t achieved or accomplished what’s on the other side over there, but I don’t need to even know what that is because this is where I am. So that was the second thing that brings me a little bit of comfort as I navigate this space.
Dani : Yes. It’s so true. I love that so much and thank you so much. I’m so glad you, you remembered it and brought it in at the perfect time. The acceptance of the present moment, the awareness of just being present with it and not pushing through. I know enough of all three of us were a little bit overachievers maybe in different ways, but still we’re kind of like latch onto something and then it’s going to be this way and we’re going to see it through. And I know especially even with the transformational stuff, like I really feel like I should be able to handle things in a certain way. And when I don’t, it’s easy to beat up on myself as it is for all of us, so think patience and, and so we, we start with this underlying faith that it’s going to be okay, right?
Dani : That no matter what happens, it’s going to be okay. It really is. So starting with kind of a sense of that and then just building on some acceptance of the present moment and patience. Staying open minded and even more importantly, open hearted because like you were talking about Natalie, it’s so easy to shut down during those times. It’s so easy to shut down and retreat and numb and avoid. So I just feel like for anyone who is in the transitional time, it’s, it’s just number one, knowing it’s part of the process and this is how it works, like the whole cliche one step forward and two steps back as a cliche because it’s kind of how change happens. So putting in the context of, I think sometimes if you know a setback or that that time is coming when you don’t feel very effective and you’re like, I know something but I’m not acting it yet. So what’s wrong with me, sets in? So lots of self love, lots of self acceptance, lots of keeping your heart and your mind open for the breadcrumbs that spirit is gonna drop, keeping your faith strong, all of that. If this podcast really does nothing but let someone who’s in that period know, please give yourself grace. Know that it will pass. Know that you’re right where you’re supposed to be right now and that it’s all working for you, that I would be happy if we just got kind of that. So do you guys have anything else that you want to add to, to the conversation?
Candace: I don’t think so. I mean, you know, it was a beautiful summary of kind of what it is and how to maybe not move through it but be with it.
Dani : Yeah, that’s beautiful and I think being with it and being willing to be with it and being willing to have patience not meaning get stuck there wallow, numb avoid but be willing to actually feel it. Move through it that way, I think that that is so powerful and just want people to know that, you know, they’re not alone and find someone to share it with and, you know, people who won’t necessarily go down in the pit and wallow with you or reinforce all those, um, all those kind of old you kind of behaviors, but you want to be around a lot of people who reinforce and see the new you behaviors and the new you possibility, um, that can be, that can be really helpful too. So I know having you guys and having the support team and everything is really, really beneficial and moving through this time too. And sometimes we just want to push, but if we can just allow instead of push and just be present in the present moment, the present moment will deliver us out of it. Just one present moment at a time.
Candace: Right. Follow the breadcrumbs.
Natalie: I think the other thing is it just reminds me a bit about, you know, why we set the podcast and what we talk about with the podcast for that being is about the journey, not the destination and I think sometimes like when you’re not, don’t have that. I can’t recall what that was like when you no longer not yet, so when you don’t have the not yet thing, you know that’s really like what you’re seeing to be the destination. You’re not really looking at the phase that you’re going through and allowing that to be part of the journey and we talked about before about the walk up the hill and not seeing the beauty until you get to the top, but so much, but on the way there, even if it’s not totally apparent, but if you’re too stuck on the not yet thing. If you’re a to living in what that looks like and why you don’t have it, then you really are missing the whole point.
Dani : Oh, that’s so beautiful. Thank you so much Natalie. Thank you guys so much and thanks for listening to our podcast and you can find us on itunes or really anywhere, our website, visit our website anywhere you can listen to a podcast., basically we are, and our website is at followingsoulspiration.com. So check it out, subscribe. We’re glad to have you here and I’m really glad to have you two here. So I love you guys.
Candace: Love you.
Natalie: Thank you.